Popping a hole in the bubble...

...alternately titled: The "F" Word.

Those that know our family know the tight bubble we are currently raising our young children in. I take pride in the bubble, because I believe it is the right place for my 4, 6, 8, and 10 year olds at this point in their lives.

My 5th grade 10 1/2 year old, is indeed though, beginning to show signs of curiosity in what exactly might be outside the designated bubble. As I begin to navigate the new waters of these pre-teen years, I am recognizing that it is okay to begin to pierce a small hole here and there in the bubble, under my guidance, of course.

So we come to movies...

We have always for the most part been very conservative with movies compared to families at large. Although within our chosen "bubble" we could be considered looser than others. My 10 yr old has never been allowed to see anything other than pre-approved PG movies.

However, last night her and I had the great opportunity to go on a date with our close friends...another mom and her 10 yr old daughter. E was not keen on seeing the newly released Cloudy With A Side of Meatballs, and upon perusing the movie offerings I happened upon Julie & Julia which happened to be rated PG-13.

I went to my go-to site for movie reviews from a christian perspective which you can peruse for yourself here . There I learned that the "13" rating was primarily for a selection of about 8 profanities which included 1 "F" word, 2 "S" words, and the remainder being the "A", "D", and "H" words.

A side note...in our family we are lean, mean, clean talking machines. Nary even a "geez" or "gosh" will be heard around here. My children DO know that bad words exist and why we don't use them, but in the younger ages, those "bad words" to them consist of "stupid", "shut up", and "gosh".

With E's advanced age, she is aware of what the "A", "D", and "H" words are, and thought she was "pretty sure" she had heard what the "S" word was, but in discussing whether we should see the movie and in showing her the review, she informed me that although she knew that there was a bad "F" word, she did not know what the word was.

Precious.

Isn't that so refreshing? That a 5th grade, 10 1/2 year old does not know what the "F" word is?

I love my bubble.

Anyway...

I talk to my friend and we decide we are going to go for it because the movie had a great review and we thought we could overlook the 7 or 8 instances of profanity, as we know our girls and know they know to never use that language and why.

So off we go.

It was indeed a great movie that I really recommend! (As a side note, I now am in love with Julia Child, am re-reminded what a uniquely gifted and talented actress Meryl Streep is, and that I WILL, nay, MUST make Julia's "Boof Bourgionione" at some point in my life...)

I have to tell you that the movie could have been total crap (also a word we try to discourage, however I find that it slips out of me way too much to have any hope that my children won't be desensitized to it in their future...) and E would have thought it was the greatest night of her life, simply because she was being allowed to see a PG-13 MOVIE (while sipping the most monstrous "small" $5 slushie drink which made me want to puke not only by looking at it, but also for paying for it!)

Anyways, about 2/3 through the movie she leans in to me and says, "mom, has the "f" word been said yet?" I said, "No, not that I have heard", and she says "Okay, I wasn't sure if I had missed it or not."

So now I was on my guard.

Sure enough, when the moment came, it was dramatic and unmissable. There it was. Out there. My 10 1/2 yr old had just heard the "F" word for the first time in her life.

As we left the theatre at the end of the movie, commenting on how good it was, how much we all enjoyed it, and how we all want to get Julia's cookbook and start cooking up a culinary storm, she leans into me and said "So that was the "F" word?"

I say, "Yes. And its really the most vulgar swear word. Its a terrible word and I hope you forget it."

Then she says "I don't know what I was expecting but it just wasn't what I was expecting."

I just started laughing at that. My precious, bubbled child who had no notion of what the "F" word might be, was unimpressed at the unveiling of the word. I just had to laugh. As we were walking out and talking to the girls about bad language and hearing their sweet thoughts on it and why they know not to use bad language, I mentioned E's comment about the unveiling moment of the "F" word.

My girlfriend and I got to chuckling when we tried to imagine what she thought the word might sound like (I am laughing out loud to myself right now). We started making up crazy F words that sounded more dramatic... "Flugalschnaderheimin!"..."Fraldindoedentanner!"..."Fortenmikelsnaden!"

We got to laughing so hard that I thought I might pee my pants, (which is a very hard thing for me to avoid on a good day).

It felt like a very grown up evening with our two growing up girls. It offered up good conversation and teachable moments, as well as great humor!

And although we popped a tiny whole in the well protected bubble for our girls last night, we still reveled in watching the girls, after bringing them to the "teenager" store of Aeropostle, buying them sweatshirts and watching them walk out wearing them, sweetly and innocently grab hold of each others hand and skip down the hallway of the mall.

:)